"Who am I after this? Who am I now? – Suzy Daal"

`Who am I after this? Who am I now? – Suzy Daal´, mixed media and materials, 2020

If every step you take could potentially lead to you bringing death to a loved one, the way in which you move through the world changes.
If someone causes you pain, the way in which you move through the world changes.
`Who am I after this? Who am I now? – Suzy Daal´ researches the paradox of my life in these times. In a painterly way, this installation creates as sense of comfort, a feeling that I´m always longing for but especially so right now. On the other hand, I´m looking for landscapes, for the far away horizon in what I see. I want to leave but I also don´t want to leave. I look out of the window and feel captive. I want freedom but only for as long as I don´t lose my `home´ because of it. I am not good at dealing with change but I´m also not good at dealing with the unchangeable. My finals work takes you on a journey to the discomfort of my personal transformation. It´s a self-portrait and it is confronting.
`Suzy Daal´ is a pun. `Suzy Daal´ stands for `suicidal´. It is raw, personal and the temporary self-emancipation and relief from that feeling.


This installation is my graduation work and the logical result of the ongoing research and growth of the past four years.
 

1_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
2_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
3_Untitled, a bench made from wood and ready-made toilets with a mattress and fabric draped over (ca. 100 x 200 cm) 2020
4_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
5_landscape 1, oil color on linen (40 x 50 cm) 2019
6_landscape 2, sound insulation material on stretcher (ca. 50 x 70 cm) 2020
7_Detail of landscape 2, sound insulation material on stretcher (ca. 50 x 70 cm) 2020
8_Landscape 3, framed fabric remnants (40 x 50 cm) 2020
1_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
10_Trinity, oil and paper masks on canvas (200 x 235 cm), 2019-
11_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
12_Don´t leave me/ save the dads, marker pen, acrylic and oil color and acrylic lacquer on canvas with cyanotype chemicals (ca. 73 x 70 cm), 2020
13_I am my own daughter, acrylic and oil color and acrylic lacquer on canvas with cyanotype chemicals (50 x 40 cm) 2019
14_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
15_Same same and different, two kitchen utensils, both used for making coffee, (ca. 25 x 10 cm each) 2020
16_Mechanics of a thing, two ready-made items and a piece of plaster (ca. 35 x 45 cm) 2020
17_Untitled, digital collage, 2020
18_Untitled, digital collage, 2020
19_Who am I after this Who am I now - Suzy Daal
20_The stars or flowers, oil color stains on apron material (ca. 72 x 60 cm), 2020